HAPPY FREAKING NEW YEAR!
My depression is still very deep and I cannot focus long enough to find the underlying cause.
Our visit with Hunter yesterday left me feeling empty. I still walk around with half of my heart missing. He seems to be progressing in one area and digressing in another -- then it flips. Michelle (Hunter's therapist) and I are confused as to what triggers him.
Henry and I saw Malissa (my therapist) tonight and, after we left, it dawned on me that I was no longer useful to Hunter. My focus is still on him and supporting him -- is this what the empty-nest syndrome feels like? Oh how I miss him and pray he will find his balance in this world. He will always dance to his own beat -- I just hope he doesn't hurt anybody along the way. I relish the hugs and kisses he lavishes on me and when he cuddles up next to me I bury my face in his hair. I just want to envelope him to keep him from harm.
His transitions from love/cuddly to hostile and demonic still hurts me -- but I understand. He's a "K-Z". Kid-Zilla.
My depression is still very deep and I cannot focus long enough to find the underlying cause.
Our visit with Hunter yesterday left me feeling empty. I still walk around with half of my heart missing. He seems to be progressing in one area and digressing in another -- then it flips. Michelle (Hunter's therapist) and I are confused as to what triggers him.
Henry and I saw Malissa (my therapist) tonight and, after we left, it dawned on me that I was no longer useful to Hunter. My focus is still on him and supporting him -- is this what the empty-nest syndrome feels like? Oh how I miss him and pray he will find his balance in this world. He will always dance to his own beat -- I just hope he doesn't hurt anybody along the way. I relish the hugs and kisses he lavishes on me and when he cuddles up next to me I bury my face in his hair. I just want to envelope him to keep him from harm.
His transitions from love/cuddly to hostile and demonic still hurts me -- but I understand. He's a "K-Z". Kid-Zilla.
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