Hunter Bear

Today is a mandatory parent/teacher meeting with/for Hunter.  I am so frustrated at his behavior as of late that I don't know which way to turn.  It also makes me terribly, undeniably sad.

Hunter really is a terrific kid. Really!  If his peers and teachers only saw a small part of what I see, they would know just how awesome he really is.  I sound like a parent, yet it's true, he is amazing.

In all the years of fighting for Hunter I often wondered where we would be when he became a teenager.  Technically he's not yet a teenager ~ he is only 12 ~ yet his physical attributes tell a different story.  For starters, his height.  He's taller than I am (5' 9") now.  Which is terrifying to me because he has the physical strength of a full grown man. 

I find myself walking on eggshells when Hunter and I are alone together and he becomes frustrated.  I do what I can, without giving in to his demands, if there are any, to not escalate his frustration into a full contact sport.

Last night Hunter asked me when his brother Matthew started shaving.  Matthew is 20 years old now and, as far as I know, he hasn't started shaving yet!  Then Hunter asked me when his brother Connor, almost 16, started shaving (he had a mustache at 10) and I guessed and told him he's probably been shaving for a while now.

Hunter is smart.  He has an amazing memory.  He has well-developed fine motor skills and recently assembled his very first model car.  He loves computer games, his X-Box and his DS.  He's also crazy about Lego's and Bionicles.

Sniffing the air around me, Hunter frequently notices my perfume.  He tells me when I look pretty, too.  He has also become much better at recognizing facial expressions and what they mean.  Something he struggled with (still does to some extent) for years.  If you asked Hunter which expression he sees on me the most and he would probably say frustrated!

I pray to God that we are somehow able to find the magic potion that will tame his ferocious temper when he becomes frustrated.  Sadly, society will not accept a child like Hunter, believing that his anger is manifested deliberately by him instead of it manifesting and taking hold of him.  That statement probably makes very little sense to someone that hasn't raised an Asperger's kid.

Hunter has been "Hunter-Bear", or some variation of it, since he was a newbie.  Initially I called him "Pooh-Bear" or "Pooh".  Over the years it's taken on a life of its own so I usually call him just "Bear".

I'm the only person in the world that calls him "Bear".  MY "Hunter-Bear".  For always.

Thank you, God, for another day.