I saw my drug dealer (aka psychiatrist) yesterday and when he asked me how things have been I didn't hesitate one iota before replying, "If I had a gun, I would shoot myself in the head." Told him about being terrorized in my sleep, the migraines and blackouts. I told him about trying to scrub my own face off and banging my head on my bedroom wall. I told him everything.
Doc: "Have you thought about counseling?"
Me: "Not gonna do it."
I told him I am so pissed about having this inactive VNS device in my chest that I want to tear it out myself.
He added a new medication to my regimen.
FTW.
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